Tesla’s ‘Full Self-Driving’ Becomes ‘Assisted Driving’ in Europe

RIGHT THE TIMELINE ON THIS IS MAD BECAUSE THE GERMAN TRANSPORT MINISTER STEFFEN BILGER WAS BASICALLY LIKE THAT NAME IS SUPER MISLEADING AND THE THING IS TESLA HAS BEEN FIGHTING TO KEEP THE FULL SELF-DRIVING NAME FOR YEARS BUT NOW THEY ARE ACTUALLY CHANGING IT TO TESLA ASSISTED DRIVING IN EUROPE JUST TO GET REGULATORS TO GREENLIGHT THE WHOLE THING! IT CAN STILL ONLY HANDLE ACCELERATING AND BRAKING AND PARKING AND YOU STILL HAVE TO WATCH THE ROAD THE WHOLE TIME LIKE A HAWK BUT SINCE TESLA OFFERED TO DITCH THE NAME THE MINISTRY IS PUSHING FOR APPROVAL BEFORE THE END OF THE YEAR WHICH IS WILD BECAUSE THEY HAVE LITERALLY DEFENDED THE OLD NAME IN COURT BEFORE AND NOW IT IS GONE JUST LIKE THAT. ANYWAY WHOSE ROUND IS IT?

I SWEAR I READ THIS TWICE TO BE SURE BUT APPARENTLY EUROPEAN REGULATORS ARE FINALLY MAKING TESLA CHANGE THE NAME OF THEIR FANCY FEATURE FROM FULL SELF-DRIVING TO TESLA ASSISTED DRIVING BECAUSE APPARENTLY CALLING IT SELF-DRIVING WHEN IT CANNOT ACTUALLY DRIVE ITSELF IS A BIT OF A PROBLEM FOR THE AUTHORITIES. TESLA IS ALREADY USING THE NEW NAME ON THEIR WEBSITE OVER THERE AFTER SOME MEETINGS WITH GERMAN OFFICIALS LAST MONTH AND NOW THE EU MIGHT VOTE TO APPROVE THE SYSTEM BY DECEMBER IF EVERYTHING GOES SMOOTHLY WHICH IS HONESTLY KIND OF A BIG SHIFT SINCE THEY USUALLY HATE CHANGING BRANDING BUT THEY REALLY WANT THAT PUBLIC ROAD CLEARANCE. IT IS JUST COOLER TO CALL IT ASSISTED DRIVING INSTEAD OF PRETENDING IT IS A ROBOT CHAUFFEUR. ANYWAY I WILL BE FURIOUS ABOUT THIS TOMORROW.

Tesla is renaming its "Full Self-Driving (Supervised)" feature to "Tesla Assisted Driving" in Europe to appease regulators ahead of a potential approval vote by the EU later this year.

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