Pete Hegseth Chugs ‘Spider-Man’s Non-Alcoholic B—- Beer’ in ‘SNL’ Cold Open That Mocks Tom Holland, Mitch McConnell and JD Vance

THIS IS THE KIND OF THING THAT KEEPS ME UP BECAUSE COLIN JOST PLAYED PETE HEGSETH ON SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE AND IMMEDIATELY CHUGGED TOM HOLLAND'S NON-ALCOHOLIC BEER BERO ON NATIONAL TELEVISION CALLING IT SPIDER-MAN'S BEER AND TELLING PATRIOTS TO VOTE AND SAYING HE PUT GOD BACK IN WAR AND JOKING ABOUT A FIVE THOUSAND DOLLAR VOTER REIMBURSEMENT HE SAYS HE WILL NEVER PAY, WHICH IS WILD BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY STARTED WITH STRATEGISTS TRYING TO BUILD PARTY BUZZ, SO FIRST MARCELLO HERNÁNDEZ DID MARCO RUBIO IN SPANISH ADMITTING TRUMP FELL SHORT, THEN MIKEY DAY CAME OUT AS A FROZEN MITCH MCCONNELL WHO ALMOST RUINED THE SKETCH SAYING LIVE FROM NEW YORK TOO EARLY, AND JEREMY CULHANE PLAYED JD VANCE GETTING DISMISSED FOR LACKING CHARISMA! ANYWAY THAT IS ALL I KNOW, GENUINELY.

SO THEY HAVE FINALLY ADMITTED IT ON SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE BECAUSE FIRST THEY HAD TWO STRATEGISTS TRYING TO BUILD BUZZ AND MARCELLO HERNÁNDEZ CAME OUT FIRST AS MARCO RUBIO SPEAKING SPANISH AND ADMITTING TRUMP DID NOT LIVE UP TO EXPECTATIONS, AND THEN RIGHT AFTER THAT MIKEY DAY POPPED UP AS A COMPLETELY FROZEN MITCH MCCONNELL JUST THROWING PEACE SIGNS AND ALMOST RUINING THE WHOLE SKETCH BY TRYING TO SAY LIVE FROM NEW YORK TOO EARLY, AND THEN JEREMY CULHANE CAME OUT AS JD VANCE AND GOT DISMISSED IMMEDIATELY FOR HAVING ZERO CHARISMA, WHICH IS WILD BECAUSE THEN COLIN JOST SHOWED UP AS PETE HEGSETH CHUGGING TOM HOLLAND'S BERO BEER CALLING IT SPIDER-MAN'S NON-ALCOHOLIC B-WORD BEER AND JOKING ABOUT A FIVE THOUSAND DOLLAR VOTER REIMBURSEMENT HE NEVER PLANS TO ACTUALLY PAY! ANYWAY I AM TELLING EVERYONE AT WORK ON MONDAY.

The October 3 cold open of Saturday Night Live mocked Republican figures including Marco Rubio, Mitch McConnell, JD Vance, and Pete Hegseth chugging Tom Holland's non-alcoholic beer.

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